Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize