I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Randomize
