theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
