Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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