I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
