I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
