The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
