He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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