Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize