I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
