what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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