Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
