the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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