You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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