were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
