Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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