I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
It's just like the Real World with babies
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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