where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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