that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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