Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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