im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
