it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
