she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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