Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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