Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
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