Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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