I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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