just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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