dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
