yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
