U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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