How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
