Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
