# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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