I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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