goodnight i made you a song goodbye
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
