On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
