So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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