they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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