im having a threesome with these popsicles
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
