i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize