He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
