dude i'm inner monologue high
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
