don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
