Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
