their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
