actually, I'm a sock model
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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