This girl is more easily done than said...
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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