im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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