Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
